Oh, boy, another novel from the days when it was fashionable to say everything in the longest way possible. The characters are “discomfited” and “deprecating” when they could be just plain embarrassed or dissing.
The last time I attempted this feat, the author was Nathaniel Hawthorne and I had to give it up or it would turn me off reading forever.
But this time, it’s William Thackeray’s Vanity Fair.
Thackeray’s characters might talk funny, but they are more modern than I suspected. What’s the first thing they do when when they meet new people? Why, look them up in Burke’s Peerage, which sounds an awful lot like Facebook. None of us know anybody like that, do we? Oh, no, not at all!
In only a few pages, we wade into the first romance in the book. The parents, observing the flight of Cupid’s arrow, decide to aid the cause and throw a party. “What causes respectable parents to take up their carpets, set their houses topsy-turvy, and spend a fifth of their year’s income in ball suppers and iced champagne? Is it sheer love of their species, and an unadulterated wish to see young people happy and dancing? Psha! They want to marry their daughters.”
It was silliness like this that hooked me on Thackeray.
The author admits, right up front, that he’s writing satire, and it’s delicious. Sure, you’ll need your dictionary. And your translator; these people loved to throw around their French.
Thackeray also had a little Dr. Seuss in him, giving characters names like Scufflepuffle and Snare and Tapeworm.
Anyway, about the romances. The author imports a girl a lot like Melly from Gone With the Wind, matching her with a guy like Greg Kinnear in Sabrina.
He matches up his heroine, Becky Sharp, with nearly every other man in the novel. Becky’s a cupcake from which everybody wants a lick. She throws a great party, even if she never pays for the champagne, the turtle soup, the flowers. How does she get away with it? Dive into Vanity Fair and see for yourself.
On a final note, you and I are not alone in tackling the classics. Check out this blogger who’s doing his best to make up for lost time.
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Make your own Spiced Cocoa Cupcakes to munch on while you read about Becky Sharp, scheming her way to the top.
Fun – I might just try it!